Thursday, February 25, 2010

Gone but not forgotten

Sadly, the coffee house (Artistry Café) in Portland is not happening. At least not at this time. Circumstances beyond our control are to blame, not for any lack of trying, believing or dreaming. I guess this wasn't in the plan. There is a plan isn't there?

Not all is lost. (Don't cry for me Argentina) I have gained experience and knowledge from months of working on this. Writing up my business plan, the press release, creating menus, talking with vendors, landlords, and most of all, I may have a clearer vision when I proceed the next time. Will it be a coffee house in Rutherford, a B&B in Brewster? I'm really not sure at this moment, I need to reevaluate. I need to move slowly and proceed with caution. But I do know that my dream is not dead, it just isn't ready to be a reality at this time.

So where to go from here? Remember my earlier blog, when I said that if this didn't happen I'd be writing a new blog "What to do with my life now that I quit my job, gave notice at my apartment, need to be out by the 28th of Feb and have no where to go" - well here it is. With no where to go my "stuff" is going in a storage unit, and I really can't believe how much "stuff" I have. I think I could go away for a few days, have someone else deal with all of it, give it all away and I probably wouldn't even notice. But when I am looking at my things, trying to decide which ones get packed, which ones go to Goodwill, it feels like I need them all. Yesterday I rented a storage unit, a 10" x 10" and I can't even image squeezing all of my belongings in there. But, they say it will fit. Yes, this will be interesting. Definitely some things need to go.

Today there is another long to do list. Actually a lot of the same things that I would be doing if I were leaving for Portland on Sunday, but now I am doing it with a heavy heart and a feeling of loss. I shouldn’t look at it that way. I need to think about it as though the timing wasn't right. Wasn’t meant to happen. There was something all along the way that kept eating at me. It doesn't really matter at this point, things again have changed. And I just have to believe something better is right around the corner. Until I figure out what that is, I think I will take a month or two, decide where I really want to be, and if I can figure out where that is maybe then I can decide what I want to do there.

Stay tuned. . .

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