Sunday, July 18, 2010

Jack the Rabbit

There is something to be said for these older houses. The fact that they are old makes everything that you wouldn’t tolerate in a new home, not only tolerable, but acceptable. Some call it charming. The interior doors don’t shut tightly, the windows have cracks and the floors squeak with every step you take. But I must say, I do love the hardwood floors. Scratched and stained, swollen in places so that you could almost use them as beginner skateboard ramps, but cleaning these floors is a breeze! All I have to do is open the windows and voila, nature does all the work, gathering these little dust balls in corners and along the baseboard. Then I  simply bend down and pick them up. Actually, the dust bunnies that have gathered here are not so little, less like cute little bunnies and more like scraggly rabid jack rabbits! What one person might call “disgusting” I am calling extremely efficient. I am trying to live with a more “wabi sabi” outlook on life, appreciating imperfection. Finding beauty in what otherwise might be considered only “junk pile” worthy. Not stressing over dust and other unneccesary details.

Meet Jack the Rabbit. Oh please, don't act like you've never found one of these in your house!

Living without many of the “modern conveniences” that many of us have come to expect, to depend on, this house is teaching me to appreciate simplicity. But there are times I find myself yearning for the day I hear that comforting hum of a Bosch dishwasher, the loud grumble of a hungry garbage disposal and the thrill of hearing the A/C click on during these 95+ degree summer days. Hopefully all this charm won’t lose its charm anytime soon.

Most of the house has now been filled with our Craigslist “finds” – though some are not quite what I wanted once I got them home. I have now created a stockpile of used furnishings out in the garage – just waiting for the day I can have a great neighborhood sidewalk sale. We bought a leather sofa because it was a great price, comfortable, and I really liked the 76 year old man we bought it from. He was a retired Master Gardener from Hawaii. The sofa had been purchased in Hilo and for some “Waikiki” reason, made me want to take it home. But, the truth is, I never wanted a leather sofa nor did I want the color brown. I guess I’m a sucker for a charming old man. Now I will either be relisting it on Craigslist, or holding on to it for the day I have more space, maybe even a home office.

 Persian carpet, designer coffee table, my daybed, and Leather   sofa!!!
Dressing up an old wall heater

So basically now the place is feeling like home. Reality has set back in, kicks me in the head and reminds me that I need to find something to do. Not that I haven't been trying.  I still can’t get the coffee house off my mind, still hoping something will happen with that.  I don’t have any real prospects for work on the horizon, but trusting that something “fantastic” will be coming my way. I try and clear my own “dust bunnies” from my head, clear my thoughts and vision, and sit down to make a plan. But the plan making feels forced and unnatural. Not wabi sabi at all. One thing that I have learned in my life, that has proved true for me, is not to trust either your head or your heart. They don't work well together. Trust your gut. It won’t lead you astray. Mine is telling me a few things right now. For starters, I wasn’t put here on this earth to worry about dust balls in the corner, I am not here to do some mundane tasks for another and get a measly amount of compensation that won’t even pay my simple little rent, and that there is something creative and meaningful that I am supposed to be doing. I just have to wait a little longer, try a little harder and bend down and remove those dust balls when they gather.

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